The (German) self-victim pattern

It seems as if “the German” (or even “the Western European?) has a problem standing up for himself, his family and his way of life without going to extremes. You get the impression that Germans let everything happen to them until they either perish or overcompensate to such an extent that everything ends up in ruins.

Afterwards, he puzzles over how this could have happened. This pattern is very, very old, many hundreds of years or even older? And it is a Central European phenomenon, at least in this form.

But why is this the case, where does this (victim) pattern come from and, more importantly, how do we get out of it?

In the Middle Ages

Let’s take “the Middle Ages” as an example. Of course, there was no such thing as “the Middle Ages”, or at least it wasn’t the same everywhere in Europe. Above all, people were not the same everywhere. But there were certainly patterns that ran through the entire Central European system at the time.

Basically, there was a small ruling class of nobles whose rule was not questioned because it was “God-given”. And there were many people who virtually belonged to these noblemen. They were called serfs.

They worked for the nobles and were allowed to keep their mouths shut. They were not free, were usually not allowed to leave their village and had to work all day. Church was on Sundays and that was all there was for these people.

Until the aristocracy quarreled, which was the rule rather than the exception back then. In this case, the serfs were also allowed to go to war. The nobility told them who they were up against, put a weapon in their hands and then they were let loose.

And it’s not uncommon for all the frustration to be vented in battle. Those who were lucky enough to still be alive afterwards have returned to their clod and shut up again. Questions were only asked in the pub and then only if nobody was listening. Nothing could be done anyway.

Every now and then there were revolts, which were usually resolved with extreme bloodshed. After that it was quiet again and everyone went back to their huts, if they had survived.

That’s how it was for many centuries and it wasn’t that long ago. Nothing was questioned, because the church said that God wanted it that way. Questioning God was even less advisable than questioning his ruler. This quickly ended fatally and in hell anyway.

This pattern between “shut up” and “fight fanatically” has neither been processed nor weakened to this day. It is still only questioned by a few. It was suppressed, you can’t show it, we learn that as small children. And so it ferments away underground and must inevitably discharge at some point. But then again extreme and bloody.

Working out

But there have always been people who have worked their way out of it. And yes, even in the darkest days of the Middle Ages, there were ways to improve your own situation by working hard and, above all, working on yourself, by saving and investing, by using your brain, by taking risks.

Serfs could also buy their freedom under certain circumstances. Or they could flee and seek their fortune elsewhere.

Yes, that was of course extremely risky. Also the buyout. Because free had a completely different meaning in the Middle Ages. You were free as long as you defended your freedom. You had to be constantly alert, set and define your own boundaries and defend them with your life if necessary.

Not everyone has taken that upon themselves. Serfdom seemed to be the more comfortable way. But the few who have really gone down this path have often become extremely successful. One of my favorite examples are the Fuggers. In just a few generations, they made it from a simple farmer to – with Jakob Fugger – the richest man in Europe. Against massive resistance from competitors and rulers.

The whole middle class emerged back then, merchants, craftsmen, cities, etc.. So it was always possible, even in the darkest times. Through hard work, using your brain, persistence and a willingness to invest. Even your own life if necessary. Some have done this, the masses have not.

Today’s time

I still see these patterns today, especially in Germany. “The Germans” usually keep their mouths shut and are well-behaved. Even if you take away their livelihood, they remain silent and well-behaved. You can overrun them, torture them, lie to them, torment their children and make them fanatical. Without running the risk of being questioned too much.

It starts in kindergarten. “Non-violent” has now become a religion. A boy who fights? Not possible! Disaster. Immediately to therapy! Harsh words? Phew, at least an insult, if not discrimination. Off to the therapist! If you can still define yourself as a boy or a girl at all. Or is allowed to define itself at all.

Just like the serfs of the time, except that they didn’t have a therapist but a confessor. Keep your mouth shut and work. And there’s more: just like back then, anyone who starts to work their way out of the pattern and stand up for themselves is eyed with suspicion and often opposed by their own people. Nowadays often referred to as “toxic” or even “Nazi” … inflationary …

Often entire clans or villages were collectively punished for the “misdeeds” of individuals. Often with the justification of “higher” goals. Back then, they were mostly religious, but today people are more creative and believe (sic!) in science instead of God. And always for the supposed good of society.

People have developed a collective pattern of keeping themselves down and catching any dissenters if they are not careful. And the respective rulers naturally take advantage of this with glee.

Until a strong leader comes along and calls the people to war. Then they drop everything, pick up a weapon and fight fanatically against what is presented to them as the enemy. This can be practically anyone. It doesn’t matter at all.

Until the war is over. Then they go back to their floe and keep their mouths shut again. But without ever questioning this pattern.

Where is the middle way, where is the solution?

This game has been going on for so long that hardly anyone questions it anymore. And if so, then these are the people who would have worked themselves out in the Middle Ages. You have to imagine that. This pattern certainly existed before the Middle Ages, perhaps several thousand years ago! This is no longer an ancestral issue, it is a human issue. At least in Europe. Other patterns have formed elsewhere, but we are not interested in them now.

The masses obviously still do not question this and are therefore defencelessly at the mercy of the pattern. There seems to be no middle ground between “keeping your mouth shut until you give up” and “fighting fanatically”. The political parties and their respective supporters naturally take advantage of this. After all, what could be better than a people who do what they are supposed to do?

Only a few see the middle way and they are often the victims of massive hostility from both camps. The serfs and the rulers.

The middle way would be to clearly define individual boundaries and to maintain these boundaries without backing down, but also without fighting fanatically. Standing up for yourself”. Clear and strong. Even with headwinds and even accepting the hostility and injuries that may result.

How do you get there?

Of course that is possible. It is not only possible, it is necessary if we want to end this game of “shut up” and “fight fanatically” and finally live freely.

It is about recognizing these extremely deep-seated patterns, becoming aware of them and working on and releasing them. This is a process that involves a lot of reflection, energy work, ancestor work and dealing with beliefs. A process that must leave the purely material level of the mind and thinking. A process that can take years.

A process of growing up, of becoming strong again, of recognizing oneself. Of accepting oneself. A process in which feminine and masculine principles can be allowed and lived again. In which being strong and being weak are put in the right position. A process in which you reposition yourself, your own well-being and that of your family as the fundamental goal in life. If necessary, even against the resistance of others.

Sometimes it also means going against your own people, against your own family (of origin). Not to attack them, but to stand. For who you are and who you want to be. Stand and leave.

It means enduring the headwind, enduring the attempts of those who want to pull you back. Anyone who has ever started their own business knows these patterns. Anyone who has ever stood up for themselves knows this pattern. Anyone who has ever had to defend themselves knows it. It can mean being the first to stand up. It can mean being the only one for a while.

But you don’t have to go that far. It’s about everyone becoming fully aware of who they are and why they are here. It’s about seizing and retaining power over your own situation, your own life. It’s about realizing that you don’t have to make yourself small, that you can stand up for yourself and that you have the right to stand up for yourself. That you are allowed to say NO. Even against the interests of others, if necessary!

It is about becoming clear about your mission in life and fulfilling it. It’s about feeling again what is happening on the outside and how the inside works so that you can stop. For yourself.

This is completely independent of age, social class, belief systems, religions, gender, sexual preferences or even political views. The result is YOU yourself, standing upright, standing for YOU.

Without attacking, but also unassailable for others!